Why a little bit of Gossip can FIRE UP your Team

Admit it. There is a part of us that will always be jealous of other people. Whether we’d like to admit it or not, as early as 2, we have already been feeling this emotion towards our mothers – or rather towards those people who we think are taking our mother’s attention away from us. As we grow older, the level of jealousy that we feel intensifies too. The jealousy stays – it is the reason that it does intensifies. And the flames that fan that jealousy will ultimately turn into this monster called Gossip.

There are a lot of reasons why gossip can’t be helped. One of them being is that it adds spice to our everyday lives. Although gossiping or ‘tsismis’ has already been accepted all over the world – in the 4 corners of the office, it remains to be the elephants in the room wherein we dare not talk about ‘our issue’ with one another.

When people hear the word gossip or tsismis, we think negatively. But are all tsismis bad? Why is it that when people talk about us behind our backs, we assume that it is bad-talking?

YOU CANNOT NOT COMMUNICATE

No matter how quiet or shy a person is, we need to communicate with others. Elephants in the room (things we don’t talk about openly) comes out during the time of gossiping. It is only then when we can confide in other people and let them know our thoughts, feelings and ideas, can we have a better connection with them. Take for example the deaf and the mute: even if they were given this kind of challenge in their every waking life, they still have the ways and the means to communicate with others.

THE MAP IS NOT THE TERRITORY

Have you ever done something or followed an instruction as a group and ended up doing that same thing differently? It is not because someone has a lesser understanding than the next person. It is because we all grew up with different backgrounds coupled with an assortment of challenges. Not all fifth graders experience the same 5th grader life. Not all rich people got rich having the exact same formula. Your blue might not be the same shade of blue as your bff. A set of twins could only be as the same as the other in terms of their physical appearance.

THERE’S NO GOSSIP LIKE GOOD GOSSIP

Gossips can be likened to pressure cookers. The more tight the issue is, the higher the pressure. The higher the pressure, the bigger the explosion. The best way to release that tension is to talk about it openly. By talking it out and letting all tensions leave you, your problems can even turn into amusement by letting people laugh first before tackling any problem. This will also make things lighter and surprisingly, make you think of a great solution in a nick of time.

One of the best ways to put gossip into use is by merchandising your company and your work. For this one, sensory acuity is needed to be present. Here is where you get to play inspector Gadget. You need to carefully follow (and back track if need be) the ‘tsismis’ trail. Be nitty-gritty in a way that you know first-hand what is happening and it will not end as gossip.

GOSSIPING IS A TOOL

Topsy turvy. Turn the bad into good. A little bit of gossip can fire up the whole team. Conflict plays a big role in fanning the flame. Growing up in different families with different backgrounds that would result to a fruit salad of beliefs. It’s natural for humans to judge people who are unlike them, and in turn, talk about them behind their back. You see, gossip only works if people see something different, exciting, or anything that is non-traditional.

 

Here are some tips on how to level up on your ‘tsismis time”:

  1. A positive tool for upper management. Take a turn by using gossip as a diagnostic tool for managers and supervisors. It is a way for them to know what people are feeling/thinking about the company. If taken in a positive way, this could help solve a lot of problems inside a company and could help employers and employees alike to be at their best.
  2. Gossip makes you a better story teller. Remember, every story has a beginning, climax, and ending. It enables quiet people to talk.

Being a good storyteller is easy, but being a great one wherein every ear is holding on to your every word is no less than having the skill of a magician. In fact, innovative ideas begin with gossips. Innovative ideas, therefore, as a result, is an idea that started from story telling.

  1. Elephants in the room promotes culture. The culture that gossips, intoxicates. Gossip mirrors something. It builds a certain level of trust or humanness. If fused well, it can provide a sense of trust.
  2. Gossip identifies conditions you should change.

It surfaces the elephant in the room. Pay attention in what comes out of your mouth and the mouth of others. Gossip time helps protect society. News such as being watchful about a certain person(s) can be true or not, but, it can allow us to raise up our invisible wall and move with caution.

 

In my study of human behavior, I have come to realize that although gossip can be a source of intoxication around the office, it is also a validation of ourselves that we are not all that bad. Do we believe everything that we hear? Our human heart and natural love for our fellow earthlings give us this certain level of trust that enabled our forefathers to get out of their caves and socialize with others.

Here are the ABC’s of being a responsible gossiper:

ASK

A responsible creative gossiper would not just blindly (or deafly) believe whatever he or she hears. You have to get to the source. We should show alertness when it comes to gossiping. No, not alert in a way that we are the first to ‘tell all’. Being Alert in this context means showing sensitivity if the news is worth gossiping about or better yet, just be alert enough to catch your tongue. Learn how to ask first before you conclude and be a contributor of fake news.

BANTER

Bantering is one way of being in the know without feeling guilty of being ‘tsismoso-tsismosa’ It opens the mind of the questioner and gets the most truthful in-your-face response.

CANDOR

Turn gossip into positive by giving an open and honest expression. Be awesome by sharing positive gossips that would lift and inspire other people up. It will not only look good for the person you are gossiping about, but, it will rise you up as well.

Finally, Be a warrior of change. Don’t be sucked in by the regularities around you. Be brave enough to shake things up for the better. Everyone gossips. It is an open to the public kind of sin. It is accepted, but never wanted. It is enjoyed by many but never wanted to be a subject of. We cannot help ‘tsismis’, but, we can contribute by turning a bad gossip into a positive one.

 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.